It seems to me that the question that swirls around this topic and the countless others that the Church faces every day is just how far Christ expects us to extend our love, acceptance, and forgiveness. But then, if we have to ask, it appears that we missed the point of His life and death, and life again.

"I'm a supporter of gay rights. And not a closet supporter either. From the time I was a kid, I have never been able to understand attacks upon the gay community. There are so many qualities that make up a human being...by the time I get through with all the things I really admire about people, what they do with their private parts is probably so low on the list that it is irrelevant." ~Paul Newman~

Am I a supportive ally, or do I hide my beliefs for fear of confrontation or rejection? Lord, help me to acknowledge and work on any uncertainties I have in coming out as a straight ally. As I grow in confidence, help me to increasingly let my family, friends, and colleagues know that I support equality for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people. Whenever I have an opportunity, let me say something supportive of GLBT people, whether I'm responding to a homophobic joke or remark, commenting positively about a current event, or making the case for equality in a discussion.

"We have the opportunity to correct a very serious mistake that was made in the Middle Ages, when gay and lesbian people were attacked by the church. And it's going to be the emancipation not only of gay and lesbian people, and not only of the church, but all people." ~Desmond Tutu~

"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples--when they see the love you have for each other." John 13: 34-35 (The Message)

Permalink

Are most Christians homophobic and, if so, what can be done about it?

When I was 17 years old, my old school Southern Baptist mom became suspicious and opened one of my sister's letters to a female friend. She discovered that my sister was gay and told me about this, then confronted my sister with the letter when she came home that afternoon. I remember experiencing a searing anxiety that seemed to rip me in half as I watched this confrontation. I felt intense compassion for my sister's suffering and embarrassment, but I was convinced to the core that my mother was right that homosexual behavior was a "sin," and I wanted my sister to be rid of this sin.

As the years have gone by, I have watched my sister grow into a person who now has a monogamous loving relationship with her partner. They are also raising two girls, age 3 and 1, who were given up for adoption by poverty-stricken mothers in Guatemala. These two little girls are now the light of my mom's (as well as my sister's) life, and they are happy, healthy, and loved.

I have examined this set of life experiences through many different lenses. Today, I am struggling to see it as Jesus might look at it.

When all is said and done, I do not believe that Jesus would look at my sister's life, flowering with love for her young and growing family, and see sin. Sin is a difficult concept to understand in the first place, but seeing sin as "a list of things that are bad because they are mentioned as bad somewhere in the Bible" is not the approach I am willing to take any longer. One can feel sin: it is full of selfishness, and there is not much love in a life of sin.
My sister's life is full of love.

Back to the original question: Are most Christians homophobic and, if so, what can be done about it? I believe that there is homophobia masquerading as righteousness in many Christians. The challenge, I believe, is for Christians to approach Christianity as a practice (walking the path of life as Jesus walked it) rather than as a set of rigid beliefs. Once this shift occurs, Christ eventually takes over our lives, and our hearts become filled with love and compassion for others, taking little notice of their sexual orientation.

Permalink

Throughout Jesus' ministry, he spent time with many kinds of people. He spent time with tax collectors, fishers, prostitutes, Pharisees, lepers and sinners of all kinds. Jesus knew something that many modern day Christians have overlooked. He knew that God wanted him to spread His love amongst all types of people, for everyone is a child of God. God called us to that same task. So if we are supposed to love everyone (even the guy that cut us off the other day), why are Christians viewed as being afraid of homosexuals? They are still human just like you and I, and they are all children of God.

The other day, I was listening to the radio and heard a discussion on the church and homosexuals. The speaker brought to my attention a fact that I never really thought of before. He said that there are people out there that have an attraction to the opposite sex, but know that it's wrong. They want to go God's way, but have no support from the church. How can a person with homosexual desires overcome their temptations if the church rejects that person? We've sort of shoved those people out to deal with it all on their own. Some of you may have experienced some kind of a temptation, weather for someone of the opposite sex, same sex, or even a temptation of a substance. You know that temptations can not be overcome simply by yourself, it takes accountability and support. If the church is not able to give that support, than the church is not doing what it is called to do.

Jesus was opened to all people. He may not have accepted their lifestyles, but he also did not judge them. He simple loved them, and that love rubbed of on them and changed their hearts. God is calling us to this same non-judgmental and loving nature. I challenge you to take these words with you into the world and see it change hearts by the love Christ has given you.

Permalink

Homophobia: 1. fear of or contempt for lesbians or gay men 2. behavior based on such feelings.

'Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 1 Corinthians 6: 9-10.

Last week was about being a hypocrite. As we all paid attention and learned to not be hypocritical, we should understand hypocrisy and homophobia go hand in hand. That means that we cast an unfavorable eye upon this particular sin as if we are perfect and away from sin. Our hypocrisy is that we think that because we are regular church-goers and saved Christians, we have earned the right to cast judgment upon the sinners of the world. Do you really believe that Jesus Christ would be happy that any person is condemned to Hell? Do you think he found joy in mocking or persecuting sinners? If you read your Bible closely, the only people that Christ was angry at were the hypocrites, the Pharisees. Christ had compassion for the weak, for the sick, and yes, for the sinners. This is not to say that we have to condone such actions. Christ did not condone sin, but he was the first to forgive, always saying, "Now go, and sin no more." So before you say that the Bible says it is a sin for a man to lay with another man, look at the passage above. I am willing to bet that there is not one who reads this, who does not fall into one of these sins that Paul writes about. Paul plainly states that drunkenness, greed, slander, swindling, and sexually immoral behavior are the same in severity as homosexuality. A sin is a sin is a sin. My question to you is this: why do we not point that judgmental finger at ourselves? Why do we not cast judgment upon ourselves like we do others? Could it be that we see sin in others because we refuse to see the sin within ourselves. If it is truly your wish to change the world, you must first change yourself. To be a true Christ follower you must be forgiving as Christ is, especially if you expect to be forgiven yourself. 'Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another.' Romans-14:12. 'Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.' Romans-15:7. And remember this, 'If any of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone.' John-8:7. Christ was without sin, he could have thrown a stone, but he chose to forgive, and not to condemn. Now put down your stones, and lift up your hearts to Jesus.

"A Pharisee is hard on others and easy on himself, but a spiritual man is easy on others and hard on himself." ~A. W. Tozer

Permalink

I have a teenage employee who is openly gay and I admire her for not hiding or being ashamed of who she is. I think about what life can be like for a teenager and I try to put myself in her shoes. As a teen, would I have been so self-assured that I could snub peer pressure and openly defy social norms? The answer is an unequivocal no.

Although this employee is able to be herself in this aspect of her life, there are other areas of her life that are a mess. She desperately craves acceptance, positive reinforcement, compassion, and unconditional love--concepts that were most certainly nonexistent in her formative years. If her family and friends are not providing these reassurances, who will? The answer to this question is the church and more specifically, this church, because I invited her to come here. She needs to be in the presence of God and feel the warmth of a caring church family. Will she come? I don't know. Most of her experiences with Christians have not been positive.

The other day I was watching Oprah--yes, surprise, Oprah--and the topic was women who had "come out of the closet" after years of leading heterosexual lives. The recurring theme throughout their stories was that each woman felt trapped in her life and felt she wasn't being true to herself. Once each woman openly, yet painfully, came to grips with the fact that her life did not jive with accepted norms, a burden was lifted and each woman is now living a happier, more fulfilling life. If you feel homosexuality is immoral, think about these women. Should they have continued to live lies, being miserable, and making everyone else in their lives miserable as well? Would you feel the same way if this were your sister, your daughter, or your best friend?

Are Christians homophobic? They don't have to be. If Christians could get passed the "right vs. wrong" aspect of homosexuality and truly look at the soul of the people they are condemning, we could do what Jesus commanded us to do--"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind" and "Love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22 37-39.

And if my employee does show up to church one Sunday, be nice.

Permalink