I feel that my Christian walk so far has added so much to my life. I have learned to be satisfied and understand that God doesn't always answer my prayers in the way I'd like, but He is sovereign. I definitely have learned to love people, don't get me wrong there are still some people that I have to give to God and ask Him to help me love them. But overall my tolerance for people has grown and I've learned that God gave each of us different personalities and desires.

I've also found that when I try to do life on my own, I end up frustrated and full of discontent. I tend to devote my life to other things that get in my way with my walk with Christ. A few examples are being with friends and family (I don't like a lot of solitary time and sometimes I think quiet time with God should be more of a priority in my life).

And I devote myself to my job and want it to satisfy me, when we all know that our jobs can frustrate us beyond belief!
Living for Christ means daily seeking His will in my life. I have to actively pursue Him through scripture and prayer. I think it's so important to have some Christian friends that you can call or email and ask for prayer. I've made several good friends here at Quest that have helped me and lifted me up in prayer when I'm struggling or have a family crisis, etc.

Try to seek a personal relationship with God this week. If you're like me some days will be a "failure", but God knows your heart...after all, He created you.

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Whether we know it or not, Christ is standing at the door of our hearts. To ignore Him is to ignore our very purpose of our lives. Psalm 138:8 says: "The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever-- do not abandon the works of your hands." This man, speaking from his heart, is aware of God's works in his life and is worshiping Him by allowing Him to fulfill his true purpose. God wants to give us all purpose, but we won't know what it is until we let Him into our lives.

I've often made it a habit to only allow God in my life when I feel like it. I will sometimes open the door and let Him in, but then when it begins to feel uncomfortable, I'll ask Him to leave. It's a discipline that we all must learn--to be able to give up everything for Him. There are so many tempting sins out there that keep us from God, but we must stay strong and discipline our hearts and our minds so that we may find out true purpose in life through Jesus Christ. And I can assure you that God's way is the most exciting, interesting, and challenging path you can take. Proverbs 19:21 says: "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." The times in my life that I do let Christ in have always been the most memorable and joyful times in my life. I only wish I was more disciplined in my mind to know that when temptation comes up, it doesn't come close to the joy of my true purpose through Jesus Christ.

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Job 33:4 says,"the Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life."

Worship 24/7. Do I do anything 24/7? Well, I breathe. I read that the word spiritual comes from spirare, which means to breathe. So can I make my breath, my spirit, more worshipful? I guess it's about being more aware of myself, slowing down my thoughts, my heart, my breathing.

I find it so easy to just let go of life (that's letting go but not turning it over to Him). I adopt an attitude of helplessness, that I can only take life as it comes; that I can't change it. But that's not true is it God? If I release it completely to you, and I live in Your word, then maybe I can change my life. Guide me with your wisdom. Show me the path You have planned for me. But I have to be willing don't I? Maybe if I close my eyes, and take a deep cleansing breath, and turn over every breath from that moment on...You will be there won't You? When life creeps up fast and I begin to feel overwhelmed by it all, help me remember to take that deep cleansing breath again and fill myself with Your strength and guidance.

When I'm gulping for air in the midst of my tears, help me remember my breath comes from You, and You will not abandon me. When I'm laughing so hard that my breathing loses it's rhythm, let me thank You for my joy. When I'm sitting in traffic and I sigh in exasperation, help me receive Your patience.

Dear God, my Creator, my breath comes from You. I am united with You through every breath I take. Let every inhale and every exhale bring me nearer to You, let my spirit be intimate with Your spirit, every minute, every hour, every day.

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There are so many things that I allow to creep in and occupy the throne of my life. New hobbies. Work. Family time. Church activities. The list could go on and on, but the point is this: I worship my life. I disregard the One who deserves my attention and replace Him with things that aren't inherently bad, but that do not deserve the worth that I assign them.

It's just hard, you know? When there are things we have to do and things we want to do, all demanding a portion of our time, the small voice of God speaking in my heart is easily ignored. If only He were more demanding...more insistent on being number one....

He would never do that, though. He would never push Himself into our lives and push everything else out. He would never take over and not allow us the pleasure of the things we love.

What God wants, though, is for us to realize, deep in our hearts and in the core of our being, that He--and He alone--is the One we should love. Our lives should be filled with worship of Him, and the things we do should all point back to the One who deserves it.

If we ever are to attain true divine peace and be completely united to God, all that is not absolutely necessary, either bodily or spiritually, must be cast off, everything that could interpose itself to an unlawful extent between us and Him and lead us astray. For He alone will be Lord in our hearts, and none other, for divine love can admit of no rival. ~Johannes Tauler

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Gracious Father,

Amen

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